Salaries Don't Matter: Financially Yoked
Financially yoked!!! Yep I made that up. Before I get into this - shout out to Trev Howard, who kicked this topic off in Tampa Bay Discussions group. I was going to talk about something totally different, but decided to jump on this. The situation: A woman making $200,000 marries a man that makes $50,000. The two are madly in love; he treats her like a queen and vice versa. Is this a problem?
Personally, the answers will vary depending upon the person's experiences. Obviously, we have come to expect that men should take care of the household, traditionally. But can't he still do that with his $50K? He is at least helping. He is making this women feel fabulous, confident and secure. Assuming he's not being lazy and content or being a bomb in other areas, why does the salary comparison make a difference? I think couples have to do what works for them. Same thing with stay at home dads. Is there a problem with that?
I have friends who have full-time stay at home husbands who take care of the kids, cook, clean and all of that. They are extremely happy and it works for them. That's called teamwork. I believe in glowing up together. He may not make as much as she does at the moment, but he may in the next year or three. What happens if she loses her high paying job? Now they will depend on his $50K. I just think it's about balance. He doesn't have to make as much money to keep a smile on her face or take her on a meaningful date. He can still pay the mortgage and other bills. A wise financial person once told me that if you have two incomes, you should only live off of one of those salaries.
At the end of the day, as long as they are happy and have a healthy relationship, nothing else matters. Now the only ones who are going to trip will be outsiders, who don't pay their bills any dang on way. But if you keep folks out of your personal affairs, they wouldn't know all of that. Keep it on a need to know.